Mats Steen died when he was just 25 years old. He was born with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, a degenerative disease that ultimately robbed him of his life. A keen gamer, his story is told through talking heads and World of Warcraft recreations. Director Benjamin Ree’s film is a testament to the positive power of gaming and world-making and how you’ll never know how many lives you will touch – even if you are not around to see it.
We are introduced to Mats parents, Robert and Trude, and his sister, Mia. Their grief is still incredibly raw when they talk about Mats. With his diagnosis and death, Trude notes, “All dreams go up in smoke. All thoughts are dark.” We see home videos of a sandy haired toddler on the beach; a shy young man at family get-togethers; throwbacks to early Gameboys and big-backed TVs. Upon his passing, the family tearfully opted to send a blog post out, having found Mats’ passwords. What they didn’t expect, is the response they would get.
There is a neat montage of emails and messages pinging and popping, one after the other, as the Steen family humbly realise how much of a difference Mats – going by his alter-ego Ibelin Redmoore – had.
Anyone who games knows that online communities can be a positive place. You can be emotionally invested in a world that you have control over. You can win. You can create an entirely new version of yourself via your avatar. For Mats, Ibelin is a strapping detective with bulging forearms and long blonde hair. Within World of Warcraft, he could chat up girls and flirt; he could swill pints of beer; he could go for lengthy runs around the city. “Our deepest sorrow,” Robert sighs, “Is that he would never experience friendships; love.” But the gaming world allowed Mats to do so in abundance.
Ree divides the film between interviews with his family and gaming friends and recreations of Mats’ online interactions. There is also a voiceover of Mats blog, which allows us a deeper insight into his mindset and experiences at various points in his life. “Normal” high school experiences, such as parties and dates, were “beyond my reach”, he notes. “My dream is to work, feel valued and respected.” Gaming gave him all of this.
What’s particularly noticeable is that – despite his own health battles – Mats really seemed to notice those who needed it most. We hear from Xenia (who plays as Reike), who struggled to connect with her autistic adult son. Mats suggests she invites him into the game. She does and, for the first time ever, she gets to hug her son (albeit virtually). The emotion and hope is written all over her face as she recounts this story. With Lisette (who plays as Rumour), Mats checked in on her regularly when her parents were challenging her about her schoolwork. With everyone he encountered, he listened, cared and offered advice, never disclosing his own needs in return. He made people feel valued and visible. No small feat.
Mats avoided all of the in-person meets ups that those in The Starlight Community organised. He equally refused video calls or voice notes. But those who he gamed with took pictures and tagged him in them, such was their desire to make him feel as included and wanted as he did for them. It must have felt touching but also hurtful. It was a further confirmation of all of the things he could not do.
But as Mats gets older, gaming becomes harder, despite his specially adapted equipment. His frustration manifests itself in the gaming world, where he purposely picked fights and behaved – as Ibelin – recklessly. Describing his body as a “prison”, a near death experience prompts him to disclose his illness with the explicit instruction that he did not want pity. “I can’t die without having mattered to anyone,” he writes.
The moving eulogies at Mats’ funeral from gamers and family alike gives way to a beautiful image of Ibelin’s gravestone within World of Warcraft. Whilst all the characters gather around that, their real-life counterparts flood the church where his funeral is held. His parents, in recognition of all of the lives he touched, have him buried as Mats ‘Ibelin’ Steen. It’s a moment that will absolutely have your bottom lip trembling, gamer or not.
The Remarkable Life of Ibelin is a touching insight into what it means to be a positive influence – both on and offline. It shows gaming in a light that it is not usually gifted with whilst celebrating Mats’ life in as joyful and colourful a way as possible.
The Remarkable Life of Ibelin is streaming on Netflix.